I've been blaming my mom for everything but I think all this isn't completely her fault. My dad definately plays a part in all this crap that goes on in my house now. Before it use to be all my mom, her just bitching about everything... but ever since I saw my dad push my mom and a whole bunch of other things I haven't excatly talked to him and then when he grabbed me and started swearing at me I totally stopped talking to him. Today I was thinking "you know, he's a good guy sometimes, I should give him another chance, I always give my mom a second chance" so today I gave him a second chance, I actually talked to him. Although after just saying hello he totally just blew up and yelled at me and then I was like "fuck this" and went to my room and slamed my door out of anger. Then he came running in screaming at me to not slam doors (when he does much worse then that to our poor old house) so I got mad.. I mean I had JUST woke up and I'm not a happy camper when I wake up. Also, all I did was say hi for chirst sake. So anyways I yelled at him telling him to just sign the fucking divorce papers already and move out, leave us alone and just mail a check every month till I'm 18 so I can get out of this hell whole when I finish high school. I'm not sure if it hurt him or not but I do know that he's now thinking more about signing those stupid papers FINALLY! I mean jesus it's only been a year since my mom asked him for a divorce.
And you know, I do want my parents to stay together so we can keep the house and so our family can be together and stuff.. but I mean the only person not miserable in this house hold is my brother and that's because he only stays here like one night a week, not even really. Personally, I think it would hurt us a lot money ways but really I don't care about that anymore, I don't think I even care THAT much about the moving thing. In truth, I've wanted to move out of this place since I was like 6 or 7. I hate everything about this place... it's just.. her. I just wish she could move along with us haha.