What does everything mean? Why is my head suddenly filled with so many questions? Is my life planned out already?
At some point, I use to believe in so many things, what happened to that? Where the fuck did my faith go? My trust in people? My hope? What does each feeling I have mean right this second? Does it even have a meaning? I hate how this questions can never be answered correctly, it'd only be someone's guess. What's wrong with me? What's wrong with all of us? At one point in my life, I said that humans are the danger of this world, that we don't give a rats ass what we do to this world, we don't care if we live or die. I think I still believe that a bit. I once read somewhere that everyday we fill our minds with little questions like: What am I going to wear today? Or we care about our look, or anything to do with us, with what we're going to do that day. And the reason we filled our head with these little thoughts everyday was because we didn't want to face the big questions, we didn't want to think about how little time we have in this world, we didn't want to think about how sad we can be, how happy, how angry, how disappointed we could. We don't want to think about anything but those little thoughts all because we're scared of the truth.
I don't think I explained that right but if I find out the page that stuff was all on I'll write it out because it truly did open my mind to how little attention I pay to life.

The worse part about all these thoughts about how we've taken over the world is that it actually makes me depressed. Partly because I can't believe we could let all this happen, but also because deep down I believe I'm one of those people that don't pay attention to what's happening, I hate when people talk about what's happening in our world because I don't want to be a part of it. Also, I'm not better than anyone else who doesn't think about life, most of my thoughts are consumed by thoughts of suicide, and I hate that.